Children of Cambodia

A trip to Siem Reap, Cambodia has opened my eyes to the reality of how children live in rural, under-developed countries like Cambodia. Children there are poor and unhygienic. Their faces and hands are dirty and clothes looks like they have never been washed.

Children are EVERYWHERE in Siem Reap. And often, kids as young as TWO YEARS OLD will work for their parents selling trinkets and souvenirs to tourist.  The level of English command of these children is surprisingly good. I asked them where they learned English from, and they said from tourists. No wonder got American accent -_-‘’  

Here are some of the pictures that I took. 

 Angkor Wat

              The place where they shot Tomb Raider starring Angelina Jolie

 2 kids begging on one of the Angkor buildings. Their hair very yellow. Malnutrition or being in the sun too much?

Kids selling souvenirs to tourists. Oh and that’s my dad =]

My dad refused to buy anything from them and they kept reducing the price.

Girl: Sir, buy bracelet. 5 Dollar for 1.

Dad: No thanks, I don’t need it.

Girl: Buy for your daughter, Sir. 3 Dollar, 3 Dollar.

Dad: No thanks. *Smiles*

Girl: Sir, please. 1 Dollar for 1, Sir.

Dad: No thanks, really.  * walks quickly trying to escape*

Girl: 50 cents, Sir.

Dad: Shakes head.   *runs away*

Girl: FREE, SIR!  

Funny lar. Haha!

Injured child

Cyber Café Cambodia style

 

 The next day we went to visit the floating village on Tonle Sap Lake. It is the largest freshwater lake in Southeast Asia. (http://mandalayinn.com/tour_tonle.html)

This was our tour guide on the lake. He’s only 18

Floating houses on the lake

Children living on the lake

Floating basketball court

 Small kid following parents to fish

The 2 boys in the red circles are paralyzed. They put themselves in a basin like thing and float to tourists and ask them for money because they can’t afford to go to school.

 Floating school

These children need donations from other people to be able to buy uniform, books and stationery.

The guy in white is the teacher

Education is seen as a privilege in Cambodia. Not every child gets the opportunity to study.

This trip to Siem Reap has been an eye opener to how poor and difficult life can be in an undeveloped country. The people there are very friendly. This place and its people have really touched my heart and helped me appreciate the things I do have. If you have the opportunity I would recommend you to visit this place. =]

 Here are some additional pictures I took from Hanoi, Vietnam.  Apparently the kids there are also very “geng”.  XD

credits to Carmen Chan Jia Wen, T4

classic poem for children

Where did you come from, baby dear?

Where did you come from, baby dear?
Out of the everywhere into here.

Where did you get your eyes so blue?
Out of the sky as I came through.

What makes the light in them sparkle and spin?
Some of the starry spikes left in.

Where did you get that little tear?
I found it waiting when I got here.

What makes your forehead so smooth and high?
A soft hand stroked it as I went by.

What makes your cheek like a warm white rose?
I saw something better than anyone knows.

Whence that three-cornered smile of bliss?
Three angels gave me at once a kiss.

Where did you get this pearly ear?
God spoke, and it came out to hear.

Where did you get those arms and hands?
Love made itself into hooks and bands.

Feet, whence did you come, you darling things?
From the same box as the cherubs' wings.

How did they all just come to be you?
God thought about me, and so I grew.

 

But how did you come to us, you dear?

God thought about you, and so I am here.

credits to Tang Tze Chiun, T4

12-year-old Speaks Out on the Issue of Abortion

Credits to Carmen Chan Jia Wen

Fetal Development

Children With Autism: Learning How To Learn

Credits to Lim Wei Liang

Intervention School Workshop

Credits to Ong Vil Sern

Excellence Begins Young

Active Children Become Healthy Adults

Your child has more energy packed away in that little body than you realize. In fact, children are naturally active and can’t sit still for long. If you can start and keep them active in their formative years, it can help form a lifetime of active living. For what is wealth without health?

What are the benefits of exercise?

Children instinctively like to play, run, skip and jump around. To them, that is exercise. The more the physical activity, the better their motor skills will develop. But all that can change when we let our children sit too long in front of the TV.

Did you know that an active child tends to:
Develop a leaner body with stronger bones and muscles

Maintain a healthy weight

Sleep better

Avoid obesity related diseases like cardiovascular disease later in adult life

If your home has a staircase, place the appropriate barriers until your child can manage the stairs unattended.

Have better self confidence

Be more alert

How long should your child exercise?

Toddlers should accumulate at least 30 minutes of moderate exercise or activity daily. This can be broken up into 15 minutes of play each time

Preschoolers should accumulate at least 60 minutes of moderate to intense exercise or activity daily. This can be broken up into 30 minutes of play each time

What kind of exercise or activity should your child be doing?

Each child develops at his or her own pace. So it’s important to identify what your child can or cannot do and what skills are right for his or her age.

Generally, young children can walk, run, jump around, climb, kick and even throw a ball. Identifying their ability will help you plan their activity and play games that are appropriate for their age.

How to cultivate the habit to exercise?

The best way to get your child to enjoy more exercise is to spend some time playing with them.
Roll a ball around for your child to catch.

Play “catch” with older children.

Switch off the substituted “babysitter”. Many parents are guilty of using the TV as a substitute babysitter to distract their children. Remember that this will become habit forming.

Put them together with other children their age. Children naturally play together.

Let them play with “dirt”. Create a sandbox and fill it with sand. You will be surprised at how much time your child can spend in it. Make sure this activity is supervised as children have a tendency to put sand into their mouths.

Water! Children who can sit up love to play in an inflatable pool. Fill the water to no more than the height of your fist. Drop in some of your child’s favourite toys and you’ll have a child delightfully splashing around. Supervise and play with him or her as water can be dangerous for any child that has not learnt how to swim!

Credits to Lim Wei Liang

Excellence Begins Young

Tips to discipline your child

Discipline is important to teach your child the appropriate behaviour, the difference between right and wrong, and instill family values in a loving, respectful way.

Understand your child

Children are little people who have a limited vocabulary and ability to communicate. They are highly unpredictable and clumsy. An expression of excitement can sometimes turn into an accidental slap. They can be happy one minute and cranky the next. They are possessive and most times have no idea what is acceptable behaviour or not at this young age. All these can really test your patience as they push the boundaries.

It will take time, patience and lots of love and understanding for your child to learn and respect your authority. While every child is unique in his or her own way and should be treated according to individual needs, here are some general tips on how to get started on disciplining your child.
Be clear about the rules. Set boundaries. Be sure your child understands what is right or unacceptable behaviour, and what is not.

Be consistent. If a certain behaviour is not acceptable at a friend’s home or outside, it is also not acceptable at home. We know it can be tough but if we are not consistent, the child can get confused by what is really acceptable and not.

Be firm yet understanding. Once you have said “no”, don’t change your mind. Stick to your rule even when your child tries to bend the rule or change your mind about it. Take the time to explain why you said “no”.

Be gentle. Most times your child will respect your decision when you talk to them gently. It is usually not what you say but how you say it.

Be watchful. Always supervise your child so that they know you are watching their actions.

Be realistic. Remember, what is normal for an adult is not normal for a child. Be down-to-earth and set realistic boundaries or rules.

Be fair. Be specific about what the mistake is. Try not to generalize as this will confuse your child and de-motivate him or her. Be sure not to get personal, so criticize the mistake or bad behaviour but not your child.

Be patient. Don’t hit your child out of frustration because you can’t retract the action after you’ve done it. Just remember that most of the time, your child is just testing and learning and most of their mistakes are unconscious. Try counting to ten first!

Be in agreement. Each parent may have different parenting styles. Try to decide and agree on important and common rules and values that you want to instill in your child. This is to avoid confusing your child. Be supportive of your spouse’s discipline decisions even if you do not agree. Discuss conflicting issues in private so that the both of you can, as they say, agree to disagree.

Be creative. Make it fun for your child to follow the rules. Instead of just instructing your child to do something, turn it into a game instead. For example you may say you won’t tickle his toes until if he cleans up. Be encouraging about cleaning up or having good manners.

Be an example. Your child simply loves to imitate you. So, be sure to set a good example and explain your actions even if they don’t understand why you are doing things a certain way. Actions speak louder than words.

Be a better listener. Show your child that he or she is important by listening. This builds confidence, fosters respect and gives assurance that you will be fair in your judgement.

Be encouraging. When you find your child being good, compliment him or her often or display affection like giving a hug. This positive reinforcement will boost self-esteem and motivate your child to be more positive about following the rules.

Be loving. It’s important for your child to feel loved and secure. Always give your child lots of hugs and kisses so that your child knows that you love him or her, even when you have to discipline him or her.


Credits to Lim Wei Liang

Child Abuse Statistics

In 1999, an estimated 3,244,000 children were reported to Child Protective Services (CPS) agencies as alleged victims of child maltreatment. Child abuse reports have maintained a steady growth for the past ten years, with the total number of reports nationwide increasing 45% since 1987 (Nation Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse (NCPCA) 2000 Annual Fifty State Survey).

Neglect represents the most common type of reported and substantiated form of maltreatment. In 1996, 25 states provided the following breakdown for reported cases: 62% involved neglect, 25% physical abuse, 7% sexual abuse, 3% emotional maltreatment and 4% other. For substantiated cases, 31 states gave the following breakdowns: 60% neglect, 23% physical, 9% sexual, 4% emotional maltreatment and 5% other (NCPCA's 1996 Annual Fifty State Survey).

In 1999, an estimated 1,401 child abuse and neglect related fatalities were confirmed by CPS agencies, nearly 4 every day. Since 1985, the rate of child abuse fatalities has increased by 39%. Based on these numbers, more than three children die each day as a result of child abuse or neglect (NCPCA's 1996 Annual Fifty State Survey).

According to information from at least 18 states that were able to report the type of maltreatment which caused the child's death for at least one of the past three years. Approximately 54% of the deaths were due to physical abuse while 43% resulted from neglect. Young children remain at high risk for loss of life. Based on data from all three years, this study found 82% of these children were under the age of five while an alarming 42% were under the age of one at the time of their death (NCPCA's 1996 Annual Fifty State Survey).

The U.S. Advisory Board reported that near fatal abuse and neglect each year leave "18,000 permanently disabled children, tens of thousands of victims overwhelmed by lifelong psychological trauma, thousands of traumatized siblings and family members, and thousands of near-death survivors who, as adults, continue to bear the physical and psychological scars. Some may turn to crime or domestic violence or become abusers themselves (U.S. Advisory Board on Child Abuse and Neglect, 1995 report, A National's Shame.)"

The Third National Incidence Study (NIS-3) of child maltreatment released by the National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect (NCCAN) in the fall of 1996. Note: NIS-4 is underway and is scheduled for completion Feb 2008.

The NIS is congressionally mandated under the Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act (CAPTA). The NIS collects data on children who were investigated by child protective services (CPS) agencies and on children seen by community professionals who were not reported to CPS or who were screened out by CPS without investigation.

The NIS studies have been published on data collected in 1979 (NIS-1), in 1986 (NIS-2), and in 1993 (NIS-3).

The NIS uses two definitions of child maltreatment: the Harm Standard, under which children are counted as maltreated only if they have already experienced demonstrable harm; and the Endangerment Standard, under which children are counted if they have experienced maltreatment that puts them at risk of demonstrable harm.

The NIS-3 gathered data from a nationally representative sample of 5,612 community professionals in 842 agencies serving 42 counties.

Finding of the NIS-3:

• The estimated number of children seriously injured by all forms of maltreatment quadrupled between 1986 and 1993, from 141,700 to 565,000 (a 299% increase).
• Considering the Harm Standard:
• The estimated number of sexually abused children increased 83%;
• The number of physically neglected children rose 102%;
• There was a 333 % increase in the estimated number of emotionally neglected children; and
• The estimated number of physically abused children rose 42%.
  

CPS investigated only 28% of children whose maltreatment met the Harm Standard.
Although the percentage of children whose abuse or neglect was investigated declined, the actual number of children investigated remained constant.
CPS investigated only 26 percent of the seriously injured and 26 percent of the moderately injured children.

Girls are sexually abused three times more often than boys.

Boys are at a greater risk of serious injury and of emotional neglect than are girls.

The incidence of fatally injured girls declined slightly, while the incidence of fatally injured boys rose.

Found no race differences in maltreatment incidence.

Poverty is significantly related to incidence rates in nearly every category of maltreatment. Compared to children whose families earned $30,000 or more, children in families with annual incomes below $15,000 were:

• More than 22 times more likely to experience maltreatment under the Harm Standard and 25 times more likely under the Endangerment Standard.
• More than 44 times more likely to be neglected, by either definitional standard.
• Over 22 times more likely to be seriously injured using either definitional standard.
• 60 times more likely to die from maltreatment under the Harm Standard.

(Executive Summary of the Third National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect, September 1996 and Reid, T. (1996). News NIS-3 Data. APSAC Advisor, 9 (3).)
Children whose parents abuse drugs or alcohol are put at a greater risk for violent victimization (National Commission on Children, 1993).

With the exception of homicide, children and youths suffer more victimization than do adults in virtually every category, including physical abuse, sibling assault, bullying, sexual abuse, and rape (American Psychological Association Commission on Violence and Youth, 1993).

It is estimated that children with disabilities are 4 to 10 times more vulnerable to sexual abuse than their non-disabled peers (National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse, 1992).

In over 9000 divorces in 12 states, child sexual abuse allegations were made in less then 2% of contested divorces involving child custody (Association of Family Conciliation Courts, 1990).

Survivors:
It is estimated that there are 60 million survivors of childhood sexual abuse in America today (Forward, 1993)

Long term effects of child abuse include fear, anxiety, depression, anger, hostility, inappropriate sexual behavior, poor self esteem, tendency toward substance abuse and difficulty with close relationships (Browne & Finkelhor, 1986).

Clinical findings of adult victims of sexual abuse include problems in interpersonal relationships associated with an underlying mistrust. Generally, adult victims of incest have a severely strained relationship with their parents that is marked by feelings of mistrust, fear, ambivalence, hatred, and betrayal. These feelings may extend to all family members (Tsai and Wagner, 1978).

Guilt is experienced by almost all victims (Tsai and Wagner, 1978).

If a child victim does not resolve the trauma, sexuality may become an area of adult conflict (Courtois & Watts, 1982).

Adults who viewed domestic violence in the home as children have a greater difficulty holding jobs, maintaining relationships with their peers and have a higher risk of developing mental health disorders (Patterson, 1992).

Men appear to be prone to blame themselves for any sexual abuse they may have experienced as children (Mendel, 1993.)

Abusers:
The typical child sex offender molests an average of 117 children, most of who do not report the offence (National Institute of Mental Health, 1988).

It is estimated that approximately 71 % of child sex offenders are under 35 and knew the victim at least causally. About 80 % of these individuals fall within normal intelligence ranges; 59% gain sexual access to their victims through, seduction or enticement (Burgess & Groth, 1984).

S tress indicators such as unrealistic expectations of a child, unemployment and low self-esteem are important characteristics in perpetrators of child abuse (Health & Human Services, 1993).

Approximately 60 % of the male survivors samples report at least one of their perpetrators to be female (Mendel, 1993).

Child Celebrity Has A Lot Of Problems When Dealing With Real Life

Children celebrities always attracted our attention. We watched different sitcoms where these young superstars participated. All the time we wondered about the fact that these young actors managed to reach such a success and wealth being at so early age. What is more, those young celebrities were extremely talented and there was no doubt that they are going to talented actors in the future.

However, when the young celebrities grew up they had to adjust to real life and look for real job. Unfortunately, it is really hard to blame them for the situations they often occurred in because there were so many factors that made a drastic effect on their lives. Since the society used to see in those actors young lovable children it was very hard to see them in another role.

There are a lot of people who think that in case the actor managed to make a considerable amount of money there should be a life after acting. However, in reality the situation is different. Very often child celebrities’ parents even decide to quit their jobs and use the income of the children to support the whole family. As a result they spend money quickly. All people who felt the admiration of the crowd while being on the stage or field they would agree that this feeling is addictive and you can not just give up everything. When the grown celebrity is no longer in the limelight they have really hard times. So, we can only imagine how hard for the child celebrities to overcome all of these difficulties. The years between 4 and 8 are believed to be the most impressionable. During that period of their lives a lot of child celebrities worked. Since acting was the only thing they knew it was really hard to adapt to something else. Since they can not get euphoric feeling from the crowd of the admirers they try to replace it with alcohol or drugs. Even though there are a lot of child celebrities that managed to create a magnificent career in the adult, the majority of the child celebrities did not end up in a successful career but in a failure.

A lot of problems child celebrities face in the adult are caused by the fact that in reality they did not have childhood and never had an opportunity to experience some of the things normal children usually do. Just recall the time when we were very young. There is no doubt that we did not have any responsibilities. We have to take this fact into consideration and understand the life of the child celebrities is not very easy and since they are not regular children they need special care and attention.

Who would object that movies have become an integral part of our life and culture. Up to date there has been produced an immense number of films and it has caused appearance of movie review site. These days start of the independent short films showing in cinemas is made a big event.

So, if you want to stay up-to-date with the latest buzz from the movie world, then use this easy tip: never forget that today the Internet technologies give you a truly unique chance to choose what you require for the best price on the market. Funny, but most of the people don’t use this chance.

Currently every industry has been affected by the world crisis and the film industry is not an exception. Search Google and other search engines for “recession and unemployment“. Visit social networks and have a look on the user accounts that are relevant to this topic. Go to the niche forums and participate in the online discussion. All this will help you to create a true vision of the situation.

Credits to Oh Jo Vyn

Three-year-old girl dies after alleged abuse by stepfather (Update)

SUBANG JAYA: A three-year-old girl, believed to have been abused over a month, by her stepfather has died.

The victim’s 27-year-old stepfather, 27, and 24-year-old mother were arrested by police soon after the child was taken to Poliklinik Komuniti Seri Kembangan by the man.

The stepfather brought the child, Jasmine Lee to the clinic after he found her unconscious at their home in Bukit Serdang at 7.45am on Wednesday.

A doctor who examined Jasmine found over 30 bruises on her body and head.

It is learnt that the injury marks found her resembled those suffered by someone who had been repeatedly assaulted over a period of time.

The doctor suspected something amiss when the stepfather could not explain how the child suffered such injuries and alerted the police.

Subang Jaya police chief Asst Comm Zainal Rashid said the stepfather was arrested soon after police arrived at the clinic and picked up the mother at their home at 12.45pm.

“The case has been classified as murder under Section 302 of the Penal Code. Jasmine’s body was taken to the Serdang Hospital for post mortem,” he said.

He added the couple are being detained at the Subang Jaya police headquarters to assist in investigations.

ACP Zainal said the stepfather, a mechanic, lost his job at a workshop last month adding that he married the woman about a year ago after she separated from her first husband.

“After he was jobless, he spent most of his time at the apartment unit,” he said.

He urged the public especially residents in the area to come forward and assist the police.

Credits to Oh Jo Vyn

Spatial Intelligence in the Classroom

by R.A. Hirsh
Source: Pearson Allyn Bacon Prentice Hall
Topics: Preschool, Middle Years (5-9), Preteen Years (9-13), Intelligence Defined, Visual-Spatial Learners

An early childhood curriculum that understands and respects spatial intelligence takes three guiding principles into consideration.

1. Spatial intelligence requires an awareness of body and material boundaries.
2. Spatial intelligence develops in stages (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964).
3. Spatial intelligence reveals the child’s perceptions, interests, and understandings (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964).

Boundaries

Body Awareness Three-year-old children will often bump into, step over, and touch one another. This is due to a lack of body boundaries. An awareness of body boundaries is a foundation for self-control. Body boundaries can be explored through mirror play, gross-motor play, and outdoor play. Mirror activities can help the child to see where her body is, and how it moves in space.

Movement is extremely important in the young child’s life. Movement indoors and outdoors allows the child to develop an awareness of where her body is and how her body moves through space. This awareness will provide a foundation for being able to move the body skillfully and purposefully in the environment.

Material Awareness After a child has developed an understanding of her body boundaries, she can explore spatial intelligence through material awareness and boundaries.

Many times when a young child of two scribbles, the scribbles go off the paper. As the young child perceives her paper boundaries more clearly, she is able to stay within the boundaries of the paper. As the child’s material boundary awareness increases, she is able to keep her materials organized and in close proximity. She respects the boundaries of her materials and of others and can use the materials to express and develop her spatial potential.

Environmental Awareness Awareness of her place in the environment is also significant to the child’s spatial development. Preschool children will begin noticing and manipulating shapes in their play environment. They will notice similarities and differences in shapes and structures. They will begin to verbalize an understanding of structural opposites (tall/short, big/little). Opportunities to explore shapes sensorially lead to spatial development. Children will identify, move, create, and manipulate shapes in the environment. Blocks of different shapes and textures, puzzles, gears, nuts and bolts, and other objects of varying shapes and sizes allow children to move, manipulate, and explore shape concepts. Montessori equipment such as geometric solids, metal insets, trinomial and binomial cubes, and knobless cylinders allow children to explore the concept of shape in the environment.

Playing with blocks allows the child to represent their environment through the creation of a model. It also helps the child to develop balance and symmetry, and allows the child to create a scaled-down version of their environment.

Preschool and kindergarten children will be able to locate and recognize familiar landmarks and streets that symbolize the way to grandma’s house, preschool, or the park. An unexpected or alternate route to these places will often confuse a child. Young children are also able to recognize the functions of specific buildings in the environment. They recognize the firehouse, police station, school, library, and hospital and have an understanding of the functions of the buildings. The children are interested in landmarks in the environment that are directly related to their everyday life. Preschool and kindergarten children will represent their environment through block structures and art representation. The child might also be interested in simple mapmaking.

As children approach the end of the preoperational period of development, their egocentrism begins to be replaced by an awareness of, and eagerness to know and represent, others. The child acknowledges and recognizes that others may have a different point of view. The child is more interested in gaining a spatial perspective on where he/she is in relationship to others in the classroom, school, community, state, country, world, and universe. Map and globe activities will become important and relevant spatial tools. Maps and globes allow the child to begin to organize the environment and become aware of environmental boundaries that exists outside of the community. The child will create maps of her own.

Perceptions, Interests, and Understandings

In order to maximize the art experience for children and help them develop spatial intelligence, a question must be asked to clarify the purpose of arts education in the early childhood classroom. Lowenfeld and Brittain (1964, p. 52), authors of Creative and Mental Development, ask, “Do we study it [art] for our purpose of gaining insight into the child’s growth, his experiences, his emotions, his interest? Or do we want to evaluate the child’s work for the purpose of showing him his strengths, his weaknesses, his creative abilities, his skillfulness or his lack of skill; in other words, to classify him?” This query is extremely significant. When art is used as a tool of evaluation and classification of children, the creativity and individual expression of the child is lost. The child’s potential may not be fully realized in an evaluative art program. Many times adults value, classify, and judge children’s artwork without even realizing it. Oftentimes children are told their project “does not look like the model,” is messy, or was not made following the directions. Even positive comments can seem evaluative. Calling artwork “beautiful” or “pretty,” or telling the child it’s “done right” is evaluative. The young child has a need to create art for the sole purpose of creating art. The purpose should never be to please an adult, to copy an adult model, or to meet adult expectations. What an adult might deem as messy may be a physical, artistic outlet of an experience for a young child. When art is used as a tool to gain insight into a child’s perceptions, interests, and understandings, the experience itself becomes much more significant and the capacity for spatial development can be realized.

Development of Spatial Intelligence and Symbols

Lowenfeld and Brittain (1964) describe stages of artistic growth, which can be appropriately applied to spatial or perceptual growth. These stages reflect recognizable form development and the spatial representation capacity of the child.

Scribbling Children from the ages of two to four are typically in the scribbling stage of development. There is a progression of scribbling. Children begin with disorganized scribbling. (This disorganization can be applied to other spatial tasks as well.) Children who are engaged in disorganized scribbling make random marks on a page, scatter block materials, have difficulty completing puzzles, have a lack of body awareness, and demonstrate an inability to organize materials.

Disorganized scribbling is indicative of sensory play. Scribbles are made simply for the physical experience. The focus should be on the process of scribbling, not on a final product. The scribbling stage is necessary for the development of spatial intelligence and for creativity to flourish. Slowly, the scribbling becomes more controlled.

Controlled scribbling is indicative of the motor stage of play. The child begins to experiment with and manipulate materials. The child does not often attend to the boundaries. Marks frequently go off the paper and onto the table or the floor. Various unrecognizable forms and shapes begin to appear. Eventually the child will begin to name these forms. The naming process usually consists of the action in the activity. For example, the child will call his picture “running,” “hopping,” or “daddy driving” (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964.) The naming aspect of scribbling signals the beginning of an awareness of symbol functionality.

In addition to facilitating body, material, and environmental awareness, sensory perception is significant to spatial intelligence. Experiences which allow the child to use and develop the five senses are critical for the development of spatial intelligence. Lecturing to young children does not encourage full sensory development to take place. Experiences that allow the child to engage in sensory and motor play increase sensory perception. Materials that encourage sensory development include light tables, sand and water, textured materials, and natural materials.

Light tables offer children an opportunity to manipulate objects in space in response to the objects’ shape, color, warmth, and texture. Manipulating transparent shapes, colored sand, colored rice, leaves, seeds, flowers, and other objects on the light table can help the child explore his visual and tactile perception and appreciate the aesthetic qualities of the materials.

Sand and water play offer tactile and visual perceptual experiences. Materials with different textures, colors, shapes, smells, and sounds need to be available to children.

Montessori equipment such as kinetic cylinders, color tablets, knobless cylinders, touch boards, touch tablets, thermic bottles, and sandpaper letters encourage spatial growth.

Preschematic From the ages of four to seven, children move into the preschematic stage of development. This stage is characterized by recognizable forms; however, these forms are not detailed and do not have a theme (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964). The child experiments with body representations and forms are drawn all over the page. There is a respect for paper boundaries, but no baseline exists in the picture. Block forms become recognizable. The child is able to put together simple puzzles, is able to purposely create original and recognizable shapes, and is able to begin to manage the body appropriately through space and around others.

Schematic School-age children from ages seven to nine are typically involved in the schematic stage of development. Schematic activities are those that have a common and consistent theme. The ideas behind drawings, movements, projects, and blocks are related to one another. Common themes often are the human body and those that reflect an awareness of spatial relationships. Feelings and actions are incorporated into creative activities that reflect the child’s whole self. The development of the schema signifies less egocentric thinking and demonstrates a perception of how others influence the activity (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964).

Gang Age After a child has become more attuned to others, he/she enters the next stage of development, the gang age. The gang age occurs between the ages of nine and eleven. Children’s activities begin to become influenced by social pressures and acceptance. The child begins to express independence and separates from parents. This happens because of the greater understanding the child has of his/her self and the environment. The child develops a deeper understanding of what is real. Generalizations and characterizations are made in creative activities. The child moves away from the schematic representation to a more naturalistic representation (Brittain and Lowenfeld, 1964).

Responding to Symbol Development

It is necessary to respond to children’s symbol making appropriately. An adult can discuss the child’s artwork as the process is unfolding if the child is willing. Questions and comments such as, “I see you are using lots of yellow,” “Tell me about your picture,” and “I can see you are working hard” are appropriate. Questions and comments such as “What is that?” “The sun is yellow, why would you make it green?” and “You’re not doing it right,” are evaluative and judge the child and would be inappropriate.

The child’s presentation of spatial symbols can suggest evidence of a particular developmental stage. The symbols can also be used to assess a strength or challenge that may exist in a spatial domain.

Credits to Lee Phooi Yin (T4)

Common Chromosomal and Genetic Disorders in Children

by T. M McDevitt|J. E. Ormrod
Source: Pearson Allyn Bacon Prentice Hall
Topics: Genetic, Chromosomal, and Metabolic Conditions

Chromosome Abnormalities

Children with chromosome abnormalities are born with an irregular number of chromosomes (more than or fewer than 46) or with one or more chromosomes that have irregular structures (deletions from or duplications to parts of an individual chromosome, or with a part of one chromosome moved to another location).

Down Syndrome

Incidence

1 per 700-1,000 births

Characteristics^a

Children with Down syndrome have one extra chromosome. Physical characteristics include a protruding tongue, thick lips, flat nose, short neck, wide gaps between toes, short fingers, specific health problems, and risks for heart problems and hearing loss. Mental retardation can range from mild to severe. Children often have good visual discrimination skills and may be better at understanding verbal language than producing it.

Implications for Care

Provide explicit instruction in any delayed skills (e.g., in language). Address health issues such as heart problems and potential feeding difficulties.

Klinefelter Syndrome

Incidence

1 per 500-1,000 boys

Characteristics^a

Only boys have Klinefelter syndrome; they have one Y chromosome and two X chromosomes. Diagnosis may not occur until adolescence, when testes fail to enlarge. Affected boys tend to have long legs, to grow modest breast tissue, a/1d to remain sterile. They tend to show lower than average verbal ability and some speech and language delays.

Implications for Care

Offer an enriched verbal environment. Medical treatment may be given to support development of male sexual characteristics.

Turner Syndrome

Incidence

1 per 2,500-5,000 girls

Characteristics^a

Only girls have Turner syndrome; they have one X chromosome and are missing the second sex chromosome. Affected girls have broad chests, webbed necks, short stature, and specific health problems. They do not show normal sexual development. They may show normal verbal ability but lower than average ability in processing visual and spatial information.

Implications for Care

Provide instruction and support related to visual and spatial processing. Hormone therapy helps with bone growth and development of female characteristics.

Prader-Willi Syndrome

Incidence

1 per 10,000-25,000 births

Characteristics^a

A deletion from a gene segment on chromosome 15 is inherited from the father. Children with this syndrome tend to become obese and show mental retardation; they also have small hands and feet and are short in stature. They may develop maladaptive behaviors such as throwing frequent temper tantrums and picking at their own skin. Beginning at ages 1-6, children may eat excessively, hoard food, and eat unappealing substances.

Implications for Care

Create developmentally appropriate plans to help children regulate eating, decrease inappropriate behaviors, and increase acceptable emotional expression. Seek medical care as necessary.

Angelman Syndrome

Incidence

1 per 10,000-30,000 births

Characteristics^a

A deletion from a gene segment on chromosome 1 5 is inherited from the mother. Children with this syndrome show mental retardation, a small head, seizures, and jerky movements. They have unusual, recurrent bouts of laughter not associated with happiness.

Implications for Care

Provide appropriate educational support suited to children's skills and developmental levels. Seek medical care as necessary.

Single-Gene Defects

Children with single-gene defects have a problem on a dominant gene (an error on one of the 22 paired chromosomes, that is, on any chromosome except X or Y^b), a recessive defect on both chromosomes in One of the 22 matched pairs, or a problem in a recessive gene on the X chromosome (boys) or a problem in a gene on both X chromosomes (girls).

Neurofibromatosis

Incidence

Mild form occurs in 1 per 2,500-4,000 births; severe form occurs in 1 per 40,000-50,000 births

Characteristics^a

Children with this dominant-gene defect develop benign and malignant tumors in the central nervous system. The condition may be caused by an error in a gene that would normally suppress tumor growth. Learning disabilities are somewhat common and mental retardation occurs occasionally. Most individuals experience only minor symptoms, such as having colored and elevated spots on their skin.

Implications for Care

Address learning disabilities; offer adaptive services to children with mental retardation. Tumors may need to be removed or treated. Surgery or braces may be needed if the spine becomes twisted.

Huntington Disease (HD)

Incidence

3 to 7 per 100,000 births

Characteristics^a

Children with this dominant-gene defect develop a progressive disorder of the central nervous system. Signs typically appear by age 35 to 45, though age of first symptoms has varied between 2 and 85 years. HD may be caused by the production of a protein that destroys brain cells. Early signs include irritability, clumsiness, depression, and forgetfulness. Eventually, loss of control over movements of arms, legs, torso, or facial muscles occurs, speech becomes slurred, and severe mental disturbances arise.

Implications for Care

Remove sharp edges from the physical environment. When memory deteriorates, provide visual instructions about daily tasks. Medication may be given to alleviate movement problems and depression.

Phenylketonuria (PKU)

Incidence

1 per 15,000 births, with rates highest in people of Celtic origin (e.g., from Ireland and Scotland)

Characteristics^a

Children with this recessive-gene defect are at risk for developing mental retardation, eczema, seizures, and motor and behavioral problems such as aggression, self-mutilation, and impulsiveness. When children have both recessive genes for PKU, their livers cannot produce an enzyme that breaks down phenylalanine (an amino acid); this substance accumulates and becomes toxic to the brain.

Implications for Care

Provide educational materials to enhance planning and memory skills and compensate for limitations. When phenylalanine is restricted from diet, children develop much more normally, and mental retardation is avoided. Subtle problems may still result (e.g., awkward pencil grip and learning disabilities).

Sickle Cell Disease

Incidence

1 per 500-600 children of African (Black) descent; rates are also elevated in people of Mediterranean descent

Characteristics^a

Children with this recessive-gene defect develop problems with blood circulation. The disease causes red blood cells to grow rigid, and passage of blood through small vessels causes pain. Children may experience many serious conditions, including stroke, infection, tissue damage, and fatigue. Symptoms become obvious during the first or second year of life.

Implications for Care

Be alert to medical crises, such as strokes. Offer comfort to children who are tired or in pain. Treatments include blood transfusions, medication for pain and infections, and other medicines to reduce frequency of medical crises.

Cystic Fibrosis (CF)

Incidence

1 per 3,300 children from European American backgrounds and 1 per 9,500 children from Hispanic American backgrounds

Characteristics^a

Children with this recessive-gene defect have glands that produce large amounts of abnormally thick, sticky mucus, which creates serious problems for breathing and digestion. CF is usually noticed in infancy due to persistent coughing, wheezing, pneumonia, and big appetite with little weight gain. Many individuals with CF now live well into their 40s.

Implications for Care

Be aware of symptoms that require medical care. The condition is often treated with physical therapy, medication, and bronchial drainage.

Tay-Sachs Disease

Incidence

1 per 2,500-3,600 children among Ashkenazi Jews (of Eastern European ancestry)

Characteristics^a

Children with this recessive-gene defect develop a fatal, degenerative condition of the central nervous system. They lack an enzyme required to break down a fatty substance in brain cells. At about 6 months of age, children slow down in development, lose vision, display an abnormal startle response, and go into convulsions. Other functions are gradually lost, and children become mentally retarded, cannot move, and die by age 3 or 4.

Implications for Care

Offer love and attention as you would to other children. Be alert to new accommodations that may be needed in the environment, such as stabilizing and securing the surroundings when children lose sight. There is no known cure or treatment.

Thalassemia (Cooley's Anemia)

Incidence

1 in 800-2,500 individuals of Greek or Italian descent in the U.S.; rates are lower in other groups

Characteristics^a

Children with this recessive-gene defect develop a disease of blood cells in which oxygen is not transmitted effectively. They become pale, fatigued, and irritable within their first 2 years of life. Individuals with serious forms of the condition may develop feeding problems, diarrhea, and enlargement of the spleen and heart, infections, and unusual facial features and bone structures. Young people severely impaired by this condition sometimes die by early adulthood.

Implications for Care

Help children to cope with their health problems. Treatment may include blood transfusions, antibiotics, and occasionally bone marrow transplants.

Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy

Incidence

1 per 3,000 to 4,000 boys

Characteristics^a

Only boys acquire this X-linked recessive-gene defect, which causes a progressive muscular weakness because of a gene's failure to produce an essential protein needed by muscle cells. Between ages 2 and 5, affected boys begin to stumble and walk on their toes or with another unusual gait. They may lose the ability to walk between ages 8 and 14 and may later die from respiratory and cardiac problems.

Implications for Care

Watch for respiratory infections and heart problems. Treatments include physical therapy, orthopedic devices, surgery, and medications to reduce muscle stiffness.

Notes

^aThis table describes typical symptoms for children with particular chromosomal and genetic problems. Children's actual level of functioning depends on the medical treatments they receive; their experiences with families, teachers, other caregivers, and other children; and their health and other genes they might possess. New medical treatments and educational interventions are constantly being tested, and many will increase quality of life for these children.

^bX-linked dominant defects also occur but are rare. For example, children who receive the gene for Hypophosphatemia on the X chromosome produce low levels of phosphate and. a result, have soft bones that are easily deformed.

Sources: Blachford, 2002; Burns et al., 2000; Cody & Kamphaus, 1999; Dykens & Cassidy, 1999; Massimini, 2000; K. L. Moore & Persaud, 2003; Nilsson & Bradford, 1999; M. P. ""I & Schulte, 1999; J. T. Smith, 1999; Waisbren, 1999; Wynbrandt & Ludman, 2000.

Credits to Lee Phooi Yin (T4)

Children learn what they live

Credits to Tang Tze Chiun, T4

Nurturing Your Child's Creativity

A growing source of concern is the lack of creativity children are expressing in their interest at home and at school. Parents are wondering what they can do to nurture creativity. Here are a few simple guidelines that can help you ensure that your child’s creativity will prosper.

1. Avoid training your child that they are to be entertained. Whether it’s constant TV watching, playing video games, or trips to the theme park, or weekly shopping expeditions, kids are becoming more and more conditioned to expect entertainment. This is probably the most dangerous threat to your child’s creativity. If they are allowed to spend endless hours seeking passive entertainment, without active engagement, it is clear that their creative capacities will suffer.

2. Creativity is like a muscle….it has to be worked. Kids come into the world with remarkable imaginations, and an almost endless capacity for creativity. In various ways, both obvious and not so obvious, kids are taught to stifle their creativity.

This begins in little ways, when they are taught to color only inside the lines. Much learning involves replicating and duplicating exactly what it taught. Limited value gets placed upon creative activities in school, and instead exclusive emphasis is put on the hard “sciences.”

If you want creativity to prosper, you have to work this muscle.

3. If you want creative children, raise them in a creative environment.
As I have mentioned in other articles, you cannot escape what you model. If your kids grow up in an environment where you model creativity and using your imagination, they can’t help but become a part of this.

Like it or not, children emulate their parents. The more that you expose them to an environment where you are thinking out of the box…decorating out of the box….creating out of the box….you’ll help your kids to think out of the box and to act in ways that are not preprogrammed.

4. Expose kids to play that requires creative components.
Instead of exposure to passive entertainment, fill your home with toys and materials that require creativity. Make sure there are lots of legos, building blocks, and crayons and paper to draw on.

When it is time to decorate a room, invite your kids to be a part of this. When it is time to paint a wall, ask them to come up with a creative idea.

5. Engage kids in creative problem solving around the house.
As kids get older, invite them to creativity come up with solutions with you. When it’s time to plan a new garden, get the family involved in the garden plan.

When it’s time to redecorate a room, put all the furniture in the middle of the room and ask them to help come up with options. When their bicycle chain keeps hopping off its sprocket, rather than fixing it for them….invite them to come up with a solution that could permanently fix the problem.

The common denominator here is to ask. Ask your children for input. Ask them for a creative solution. Keep them engaged in a home environment where creativity is a constant part of the mutual problem solving that occurs.

6. Make sure that you notice moments of creativity.
Especially during the younger years, give energy to moments of your child’s creativity. Rather than ignoring them when they’re playing in creative ways, or working their imagination, spend a few moments noticing them doing these activities.

You must give energy to the activities that you value….if you want those characteristics to grow. In the case of creativity, you can do your part by making sure that you catch your kids…while they are being creative. Don’t wait until the project is over….catch them while it’s happening.

In this way, you invest your energy in what you really value. This will ensure that you use every ounce of your influence to nurture those creative juices and to keep that muscle strong.

Building Your Child's Self-Esteem

According to researchers, most children enter school with a good sense of self-esteem (at least as defined by psychologists) and yet leave high school with a poor sense of self-esteem. What happens in those years between starting school and finishing school?

If we are to define self-esteem as “having feelings of worth or value,” then people with adequate levels of self-esteem should display a sense of realistic confidence in their abilities and performance. People with low levels of self-esteem would be expected to display feelings of inadequacy, a fear of failure, a sense of being unworthy, and perhaps depression. It is estimated that 25-35% of children have Learning Disabilities. At least 5% have Attention Disorders. All too many times during the course of their academic careers these children are labeled by teachers (or parents) as being “lazy,” or “stupid.” Remarks of this type are typically interpreted by the child as, “You’re no good,” and the self-esteem levels drop.

At least 50% of children will experience the divorce of their parents prior to turning 18 years old. Most children, for whatever reasons too complicated to go into here, will tend to place at least a portion of the blame for the parent’s divorce on themselves. Since the parents are typically placed on a pedestal in the eyes of the child, the blame for the divorce cannot be placed on the parents and must be placed elsewhere, most commonly on themselves. This also significantly impacts children’s self-esteem levels.

There are other important challenges to maintaining reasonable self-esteem, such as merely being “average” in a world that worships only the good looking, the good athletes, and the well-to-do.

Can too much Self-Esteem be bad for you?

Let me say here and now that inappropriately high levels of self-esteem may be worse that low levels. Levels of self-esteem that are too high lead kids to believe that they are more important than anyone else, and that they should never be frustrated by work or challenges in life. It leads young people to believe that they should always have their way. Inflated levels of self-esteem ultimately discourages children and teens from learning how to work hard, and sometimesl leads into criminal behavior. Anti-social and criminal behavior is fueled by the criminal believing that his wants and needs are more important than the needs, wants, or rights of others.

Inflated levels of self-esteem also are directly at odds with the development of one’s spirituality and relationship with God. After all, who needs to develop a relationship with God when he believes that he is more important, or intelligent, or more powerful than God? People are cheated in every important aspect of their lives, emotionally, socially, and spiritually, when their sense of self-esteem is inflated.

So how can we instill appropriate levels of self-esteem in our children? Briefly, here are five key thoughts . . .

First, change the way that you look at this area of life from “self-esteem” to “self-confidence.” There is a difference as wide as the sea. To “esteem” someone, including one’s self, involves feelings of “reverence” or “awe” or “honor” or “glory.” Words have meaning. Let’s not get carried away with trying to make our kids feel good about themselves by starting to ascribe to them positions of honor normally reserved for Presidents and Kings, and perhaps for God. The majority of our society’s problems are caused by people thinking that they are more important than anyone else in the world. This is not something that we really want to encourage in our children, or in ourselves.

Instead we do want to encourage self-confidence. This attribute becomes especially powerful and beautiful when paired with the virtue of self-control. Raise your children to have these two character traits, and you will have wonderful and successful children.

My Children Will Be Perfect, Good, Happy, Confident and Successful Kids!

My Children Will Be Perfect, Good, Happy, Confident and Successful Kids!

I knew that being a parent would be difficult, but as a trained educational psychologist I foolishly expected to employ all my know-how and to be able to create perfect, well adjusted, confident children. Not the case, of course! Lashings of praise, love and encouragement and they still fear failure and lack confidence to some extent - but what might they have been like without it? They are though, happy, resilient, honest, thoughtful and decent kids - appreciating that at 12 years old they still have time to change - and I am proud of them (and indeed, myself)!

Obviously, one cannot completely protect one's offspring from the cruelties of today's world or shield them from spiteful or bullying peers, but one can help to build them up, strengthening and supporting as they take their first steps into independence.

Know your child

The main thing which has been driven home is that all we can do is 'the best with the raw material we have'! Kids are born different and need different approaches and levels of encouragement. My son responds very badly to negative reinforcement - he rebels and grows angry, and if he is already in trouble he feels he has nothing to lose and will go for broke - but telling him he has been doing really well and that I need him to be helpful and 'my good boy' makes him bend over backwards to do what I ask and to please. He physically grows in stature and self-esteem. My daughter would not fall for that, but complies readily with a calm rebuke.

Treat each child with respect

Your child is a human being with rights, and valid opinions and views. Encourage and foster rather than fight independence. Communicate, listen and show respect for their wishes (have a set time each day where you have quality time and really talk). Don't lash out in anger - that is giving the message that it is OK to be abusive - where possible, ignore unwanted or volatile behaviour, walk away and later address sticking points again when both calm. A good boss works with emotional intelligence and demonstrates empathy; parenting is the same. Be prepared to apologise to the child if you get it wrong.

Building Self-esteem In Your Child

One of the best lessons that parents can teach their children is that you don't need to be the same as everyone else in order to fit in. Have you seen many jigsaws where all the pieces were the same shape and size? It's the diversity of the human race that adds to our unique beauty and individuality. It's what makes us special and that is the message that we need to communicate to our children.

Feeling Different Everyone is different, but problems can arise when a child feels that everyone else shares a common trait that they don't. The larger child, for instance, can feel isolated because they perceive everyone else as slim and feel that they are less valid as a person because they are made to feel uncomfortable about their size, often by insensitive taunts from other children who make unkind references to their weight as though it is something of which to be ashamed. When my eldest son was 14, he gained a lot of weight and I recall how distraught he was when my partner's inconsiderate and callous sons referred to him as "Lard" rather than his real name of Kristian.

Feeling different can batter some children's self-esteem, whereas others view it positively and build on their individuality to become great achievers. A lot depends on the child's individual personality, but there are techniques that every parent can employ to help nourish and elevate a child's self-esteem and confidence.

Building Self-Esteem Begins at Birth Touch is the first sense to develop and this is the first way that infants begin to learn about the world around them. One of the best ways to bond with your baby and begin the self-esteem building process is through infant massage, but this is also a time to interact verbally with your baby.

Emma Miller, D.Div, Child and Family Specialist and creator of the Gentle Touch® Program advises asking your baby for permission before touching her. Whilst a parent may feel that it is his or her right to touch a baby of their own, they are not considering the wishes of the baby. Emma says, "Remembering that infants are highly interactive from the beginning is an important part of not taking them for granted." When you ask your baby for permission to touch her, it encourages and teachers her to respond and makes her feel important and needed. "This is the foundation for healthy self-esteem and the ability to be honest with herself and her feelings," says Emma.

In general, the higher a child's self-esteem, the more competent they are at dealing with the unpleasant situations that life deals and that includes other people's attitudes towards them. An overweight or disabled child, for example, will be more capable of dealing with cruel taunts from unkind children and will still be able to maintain a sense of self-worth, irrespective of any insensitive jibes that are thrown at them. The higher a child's self-esteem before adolescence, the more adept they will be at coping with negative peer pressure.

Self-Esteem and The Larger Child Despite the numerous "big is beautiful" campaigns, promoting the interests of the larger person, the media continues to glamorise thinness and represent larger people as objects of ridicule. Unfortunately, children are very much influenced by what they see and hear, not only on the TV and in magazines, but also from the mouths of adults, including their parents. If a child hears their parents referring to someone's size in an unkind way, they grow up believing that being fat is socially unacceptable. How sad it is, therefore, if such children end up struggling with their own weight or don't conform to the "rake thin" ideal. The way is simply being paved for potential eating disorders, self-image problems and low self-esteem.

In fact, many children will go through periods where they seem to be growing outwards rather than upwards and yet many of these may end up as slim, strapping six footers. However, the emotional scars that were formed as tubby youngsters may remain with them for life. In fact, the body needs fat to survive and it is as harmful, if not more, to be underweight than it is to be overweight.

There are many larger children who are popular and outgoing individuals who have recognised that personality, talent and likeability isn't shaped by size. Acceptance builds self-esteem and when parents accept their children, they learn to accept themselves and in turn will be accepted by others. If a parent makes cruel references to a child's size, he may become withdrawn, insecure and anxious and lack the confidence to make friends. After all, if a child cannot accept himself because his parents object to his size, how can he expect anyone else to accept him?

Being overweight is not a crime, but if you feel that your child has a serious weight problem and are concerned about his or her health, there are steps that you can take to help the situation without forcing the child into uncomfortable eating or exercise regimes. Substituting high-fat foods for lower-fat options without changing drastically changing the diet can significantly reduce your child's calorie intake. Encouraging your child to be more active by engaging in fun activities as a family, rather than a competitive team sport, will not only boost his metabolism and improve his fitness levels, but may interest him in new pursuits where he may feel a sense of achievement, which in turn boosts self-esteem.

Even though your child may not initially feel confident enough to throw a cool reply in the direction of a taunter, it can often be extremely effective. An example of such a riposte could be:

"Yes, I might not be skinny, but at least I have a good heart and I don't judge other people by the way they look. You, for instance, have got big ears and yet I'm sure that doesn't change the person that you are inside, nor make you any more sensitive to other people's feelings."

Self-Esteem and Ethnic Minorities
It has always seemed bizarre to me why someone should be made to feel different or is ostracised simply because they have a higher level of pigment in their skin, or were born into a different religion. Nevertheless, racial bullying exists and, as with other types of abuse, it can have a devastating effect on a child's self-esteem. However, it is important for the child to understand that any difference in any culture can be the basis of prejudice. A white child may be teased by other white children because he wears glasses, or is perceived to be stupid, or has elderly parents, divorced parents or does not live up to the ideal of a particular group at a particular time.

The way in which we often try to feel good about ourselves is by focusing on comparisons with our peer group. If we possess a quality or skill that we feel is good, then we prefer to think that it is unique or that there are not many others with the same feature or talent. However, if we possess a quality that we do not feel is a positive attribute, then we prefer it if we know that there are many others like us. Therefore, if a child feels that having a different colour skin to the rest of his friends is not an advantage, then he or she is more likely to be negatively affected by any taunts that are directly related to his race.

If your child is upset by unkind taunts about her colour, you could point out that if being coloured is so unappealing, then why do so many white people fry their bodies in the sun every summer in pursuit of darker-coloured skin? Teach her to be proud of who she is, her uniqueness as a person and her personal talents. Everybody has them.

Irrespective of any prejudices that parents might hold, it is important not to pass these onto their children. Teaching them tolerance and conflict resolution skills and exposing them to cultural diversity from an early age, will help them to deal with prejudices when they are older.

Self-Esteem and The Disabled Child
There is a fine line between protecting and stifling. If a child is born with, or develops a disability, it is extremely important for the parents not to over-protect the child, which can make the child feel that she is different in a negative way. A Spina Bifida sufferer I know, for example, told me about the isolation that she felt as a result of her parents' overprotectiveness. She said, "Although I was an outgoing person and had no problems making friends, my parents never allowed me to join them on outings or social events because they were afraid of something happening to me. As a result, my friends eventually stopped inviting me to take part in group activities and that was a dreadful blow to my self-esteem. Personally, I didn't view myself as any different to say, someone who was short-sighted or someone with eczema. Nobody's perfect, so who's to say that my disability puts me at more of a disadvantage to anyone else? I also think that my parents thought I would be a burden on the others and they didn't feel it was right to put the responsibility for my welfare in their hands. Being made to feel that you are a burden on others totally saps your confidence and feelings of self-worth."

Parents can boost a disabled child's esteem enormously by helping them to lead as normal a life as possible and to allow them to make their own choices, difficult as this might be. They should also not ignore bad behaviour or make excuses for a child if she has acted in an unacceptable way. Respect and courtesy is something that should be exercised by everyone, irrespective of their circumstances, even disability.

Discipline Builds Self-Esteem
An undisciplined child will inevitably grow up with poor self-esteem. He will encounter rules and regulations outside of the home environment and will find it very difficult to conform if his parents have not regulated his behaviour. The undisciplined child will probably have no respect for his parents, let alone anyone else and particularly not those in positions of authority. As a result he will often find himself in trouble and the resultant chastisement will lower his self-esteem further.

Parents who allow their children to do as they please and who don't reprimand them for bad behaviour are not being kind. On the contrary, they are mapping out a life of difficulty for their offspring, with the likelihood that the child will encounter disapproval wherever he goes because of his inability to respect, nor understand, rules and limits.

Naturally, discipline has to be adapted according to the age of the child. A two-year-old, for example, cannot be disciplined in the same manner as a teenager because their powers of understanding are vastly different. A toddler will only just be grasping the concept of right and wrong, whereas a teenager should (in theory) have a clear understanding of what is and isn't acceptable behaviour.

Praise and Self-Esteem
Continual praise builds self-esteem, right? Not exactly, no. Whilst it is important to let children know that they are appreciated by recognising effort and achievement, overpraising a child for everything that they do can end up becoming meaningless. They may learn to stop trying because they know that their parents think that everything they do is wonderful, which is laying the foundations for eventual failure. They may become dependent on constant praise for motivation and may end up not achieving anything in life as a result. Parents should encourage their children to capitalise on their individual strengths, help them to learn new skills, give praise where praise is due and teach them to accept their weaknesses without viewing them as failings.

Effort and achievement should be encouraged, but without pressuring the child to do well. Every child's personal best is different and each child should be praised according to the effort that they have put in. A child who comes last in a school sports' day race, but who has given their best, deserves as much praise as the natural born athlete who wins the race. It is also important to teach your child that coming last does not mean failure and that it's perfectly normal to make mistakes. The child who believes that is more like to have high self-esteem than the child whose parents have taught him that it is wrong to fail, or that winning is most important. Parents whose expectations of their children are too high will not encourage healthy self-esteem.

General Guidelines For Building a Child's Self-Esteem

Improve your own self-esteem. Parents with low self-esteem may pass their insecurities onto their children.

Build on your child's positive aspects and talents, rather than focusing on what they can't do. Constant criticism destroys self-esteem. We can't all excel at the same tasks, but it is important to praise a child if you know that he or she has given their best effort.

Listen to your child. Their interests and worries may seem trivial to you, in the same way that yours may seem inconsequential to them, but listening and understanding is one of the most important self-esteem building exercises you can employ. If a child is ignored, he may act badly to attract attention to himself, or else may become withdrawn, believing that he is not important enough for anyone to take notice of him.

Asking for a child's opinion on an issue makes them feel valued and important, rather than taking the attitude of, "You're only a child, what do you know?" Children are far more perceptive than we give them credit for.

Teach your child to respect others' differences and weaknesses and not to make harsh judgements.

Help your child to plan and set goals, however small. Achieving a goal is a positive event, which helps to build self-esteem and also shows to a child that they have some sort of control in their lives.

When your child is being reprimanded for bad behaviour, it is important to explain why you feel that their actions are unacceptable and to make them feel respected, even when they are being corrected.

Tell your child that you love him or her on a regular basis.